Thank you so much to those of who were following along on my journey in the hospital last week. I was admitted for three days and given all sorts of tests which came up clear, which was great news. They released me to the care of my primary care physician and a neurologist. So far most possibilities have been ruled out, but the numbness in my arm and my legs persists.
In the end, the doctor asked me if I was experiencing anxiety or depression. I realized that while I became pretty good at taking care of myself before I had a family, becoming a mom, getting married, and working have really put my own well-being on the back burner. Maybe I wasn’t monitoring myself as much as I needed to be. Or maybe there is an underlying physical cause for this strange numbness.
Either way, I’m going to work on paying more attention to my heart, something I’ve done a lot of in my life but could always use more practice with. It’s easy for me to overthink and approach life through my mind only, especially when I’m stressed or I’m down about the state of the world. It takes time and awareness to remain centered in one’s heart, but it doesn’t have to be hard. It’s a muscle that strengthens with time and attention.
I have my follow-up appointment this morning, and we’ll see what they say. This weekend I’m also going to my acupuncturist whom I haven’t seen in a long time. I’ll be interested to hear what he thinks!
I’ll keep you posted. Hope you have a beautiful day!
Waking up each day you begin with a clean slate. In dreams you reconnect with your source and are renewed. When you wake, in whatever way is best for you, nurture your connection to God and be gentle with yourself. Can you take a deep breath? Can you be kind to your body? As a mom it’s easy for me to want to hit the ground running, and sometimes I must. In the past year I’ve begun waking before everyone else, around 4:30 or 5 am – my best and only true quiet time, which allows me to begin the day slowly, from my heart, and to write these reflections to you. It has helped me immensely to feel connected to my life’s purpose and to my soul, and has allowed me to not get lost in the fraying of days. What do you do in the morning to stay connected to your heart?
As a storm prepares to hit my hometown, I’m reminded that home is not outside of us, but within us. When everything was taken away after Katrina, a storm my family survived but in which we lost much, I learned that lesson in the extreme. Never before had I been so grateful for my friends and family. Never before had I felt so close to all the people I had known growing up there, people I normally took for granted. Eventually, things evened back out, but obviously occurrences like these are not always predictable. Our world is full of unpredictable events such as wildfires, tornadoes, hurricanes, and more. We can’t always know how our world will look tomorrow, but it if we are able to center ourselves in our hearts and see beyond outside appearances, we can weather the storm.
When things are taken away in the physical world, it can be shocking and disorienting if I am overly connected to them. If I believe the physical world is all there is, then I might feel extremely lost when the things around me change. But if I open myself up to the reality that the physical world might not always exist the way it does now, and accept that my heart is the center of my world and my true self, it becomes much easier to walk through these changes.
I’m holding all of my friends, family, and people in my heart as this storm nears the coast. As always, we never know how these things will go, which is another great chance to be prepared but also centered and open to whatever will come. All my love.
If there is something your heart truly desires, trust that it will be made manifest in your life. This desire, this soul urge, comes from your heart, which comes from God. You may not be able to plan the circumstances. You may not see it coming. It may not look the way you expect it to look. Just trust that your dreams can and will come true. They are within you to be made real.
Hello readers! I’ve decided to change up my blog format after some prayer and contemplation. I’ll be writing shorter daily thoughts Monday through Thursday, and a longer blog post on Fridays. I hope this new format suits you! As always, I sit in prayer before writing, and then write what I feel called to write from my heart.
Thank you so much for reading, as always.
When undertaking to follow your heart, you may feel called to change the outward circumstances of your life. You might be called to change a relationship or a job, or even where you live. You might feel compelled to change some friendships. It can seem hard to your mind to start showing up in a different way in the world, but if it is what your heart and soul is truly asking you for, making these changes will only result in more joy for you in the end.
Some of the things I’ve felt compelled to change since beginning this journey include my occupation, my orientation to work, my relationships, and where I live. These changes have happened in varying ways over the years. When I get deeper in my heart and my connection to God, even now, it can be scary to my ego. My ego wants everything to stay the same, to seem good, great, successful, and unwavering. Yet my heart is asking for more, for my true self – it yearns for connection, self-expression, and embodying God’s love here on earth.
Making changes in your life based on your heart’s yearnings will lead you to your true self. You can begin to trust yourself by taking small steps towards your heart and making small changes. Ask God and your angels to guide you. You are here to let your true self shine forth.
Healing your heart starts with getting still and centered. Healing your heart is the path to the self and to joy. To heal the heart, begin by bringing awareness to your heart center. You will feel it with some attention and patience. There is your connection to God, and there you can feel great love once you’ve cleared the debris of your wounds.
I used to have a great deal of anger and sadness in my heart center. At first, I was unaware that it was even there. But once I began healing in earnest, I focused my energy on trying to feel my heart. I knew at a base level that it was covered up with something. I felt my heart to be somewhat detached and removed. It was not a great way to go through life but it was all I knew. I suspect I wasn’t the only one walking around removed from my heart.
Healing my heart meant listening to myself. To heal your heart, get still. Listen to yourself. Ask your angels, guides, and God to help you heal your heart. You will not be left alone. I believe you will be guided to your highest good and most holy healing. Your heart is your connection to God. Awakening that connection will allow you to live a fuller, truer, happier life – which is something you deserve, and were born for.
What does it mean to listen to one’s heart? I write about listening to my heart often because it’s a huge part of how I healed. It can be very hard to listen to your heart in this world. Since we were children, many people taught us not to listen to our hearts. Adults around us – teachers, parents, babysitters – nudged or pushed us to conform to this world and stop following our natural inclinations. How can we learn to listen to our hearts again when we’ve been so conditioned to ignore them?
An important first step is getting quiet and still for more than just a few moments. It helps to sit still for a while, if you can. Eventually, you will begin to feel the still, small voice within. At first it may seem faint, and you may not be sure if it’s really your heart or not, but if you keep listening, it will grow, and it will guide and heal you. Alternately, in times of great need and even crisis, without having to get still, you will also find guidance there.
What if you’re not sure which one is your inner voice? I’ve been unsure about my true inner voice many, many, many times. It can be so hard and confusing sometimes! Your inner voice, or your heart, will lead you to love and peace and oneness with others. It will not guide you to do anything that will harm yourself or anyone else. It will guide you towards healing yourself. When I’m having a difficult time discerning which one my inner voice is, it helps to practice getting still and meditating even more than normal. It also helps me to practice writing. Everyone will have their own tool, and you have to just experiment to find out which one is right. Of course, it also helps to pray and ask God and your angels for help.
Healing your heart is the most exciting journey you will ever take. It will bring you to truth and to peace, and will lead you to finding fulfillment and joy just by being yourself. Trust in the greatness of God and in your holy creation, and you will heal. Follow the thread of your heart to true healing and lasting love. Don’t give up!